Random Humor 3

From RHF:

The following is is original:This is an answer to the age-old question, "Why did the chicken cross theroad?" in the style of Herodotus (Greek historian, fifth century BC, called the Father of History, but also the Father of Lies):

Another story that is told among the Cimmerians is this, that in past times Chickens, and in particular that one Chicken, who was called Misgetomenos the son of Aidoion, were wont to cross the Road. I myself, however, having seen with my own eyes the Road of the Cimmerians, am convinced that the Road is not, and never was, crossable by Chickens, nor yet by Misgetomenos. The Road is in appearance wondrous, and unlike any other thing in the world. It is a straight, flat band, made of a material that the Cimmerians call "asphalt" (which in the Cimmerian language means, "asphalt.") It is possessed of two yellow lines, being both in the center of the band, such that the center itself is between the yellow lines, and is black. As it is wide, dirty, and not seemly in the matter of U-turns, I am of the opinion that no Chicken ever crossed it.
There are three stories which are told about Misgetomenos the son of Aidoion, of which the following is in my opinion the most probable, the others being, so it would seem, completely untrue. This is that Misgetomenos was not a Chicken at all, but rather a slave who, charged with the painting of crosswalks, was called by the name of "Tsicken," which, in the Greek language, means "chicken.
There is, however, a different tale which is told of the son of Aidoion, and this I heard from the Greeks who live in Asia. This I will recount, though I do not believe it. This is that Misgetomenos was, in fact, a Chicken; further, that he did cross the Road of the Cimmerians, simply for this reason: that he might get to the Other Side.